Free Writing

Snow Bunnies

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What’s something you hear about a lot ?

 ” Short people problems “

” Thin people problems “

” Shopaholic problems “

Here’s what I find to be Common “White Girl Problems” , for many of us ( yes including myself )

#1 PiNtEReSt oVeRbOaRd

Here’s a big one , especially for me .

If there is any where I refer to for absolutely anything in this world at any given time or place  , It’s Pinterest.

My kitchen looks like I was the founder of mason jars and label guns. From Coffee to Cocoa & Toothpicks to Chip Clips .

My bathroom with the bedroom curtains being used as a shower curtain on a separate shower rod then the shower liner . . for the elegant look. . you know , in a bathroom .

My Bedroom with the typical Christmas mini lights around the mirror

Last but not least my living room with the mason jar on the entertainment center filled with little pieces of paper folded in half each one with 1 out of 50 reasons why I love Jerome. Labeled ” 50 Reasons Why I Love You . ” ( yes made with my convenient labeler )

#EverythingCanBeImproved


#2 Do You Take Debit ?

The serious SERIOUS desire to eat an entire box of Girl Scout Cookies the second you step outside your car at Wal-Mart and there’s a colorful beautifully stacked hundred count of cookie boxes made from yours truly , Girl Scouts. ” Hi do you take debit card ” ? . ” No . Sorry . “

#TheExtremeDissapointment


#3 Wheres My BEAR ?!!!

Here’s one that relates to the problems I have been running away from for months now . .

I have a weird desire for my fiance to buy me a huge stuffed animal . I tell him its so I can hold it and lay with it when he isn’t home but really it’s because i’m strangely excited about the thought of having a stuffed animal the same exact size as me . He kepts taking me as a joke and telling me i’m a weirdo and calling me crazy.

” Baby , will you buy me the huge bear? They’re on sale right now! “

” You know what else is on sale ? THIS D !! “

And the joking begins and desire for the bear is gone again , farewell until next time.

#BearyUpsetting


#4 Elsa or Innocent ?

Alright so just recently ( about two or three weeks ago ) I finally got my hair an acceptable color blonde . Because of the fact that I already have blue eyes , I Now look like the ultimate white girl , just slap on my north face and ugg boots and I’m your lady . The problem with this is when you braid your hair , boom ! you are now Elsa from Frozen and will be reminded all day by every child that sees you .

#ElsaIsThatYou ?

#5 ” Wait , its another sale ! “

I do this , a lot . My poor fiance will be trying to talk to me or get me to do something or even just trying for my attention and after five seconds of watching TV together I’m already on a website adding things to my cart .
” But babe the sale ends in 2 hours and its 10% off shipping !  “

At that moment of word release , I realized I have a serious addiction to online shopping. Whether it costs 2$ or 50$ if I’m online the shopping experience is way more dangerous and harmful to my wallet and / or bank account .

#ItemAddedToCart

#CheckoutNowForXtraPromo

Free Writing · Jeromes Journey

Miracles do exist . 

It’s almost over .. finally .

As I sit here with the love of my life on the last day of his visit for his FINAL chemotherapy appointment I can only thank GOD repeatedly , nonstop , with tears in my eyes wondering why he decided to pull through for us . Not many people are this lucky . A lot of people have to fight for years , some fight with no hope for recovery .

My baby did it though . He kicked cancers ass and with very VERY little cancer cells left my heart grows stronger for god .

As we sit here waiting to be discharged I think back at our journey as it’s been a long 3 & 1/2 months .

I remember it so clearly , waking up on his birthday morning and bringing him to he hospital because he had swollen feet .

NEVER did I think that day that I would have lost him TWICE . but both times god gave him back , he knew I wasn’t done with him .. he knew it wasn’t fair to take him at this age and he knew my baby wasn’t ready to go willingly .

I remember the day he woke up and proposed to me with a tube down his throat . I cried like a baby . I never expected any of what happened that week to happen and yeah it’s been a very rough patch for all of us , but I’m so happy to be where we are now .

I can’t thank god enough for being our savior . I cant wait to start this road to recovery for now all that’s left to do is go up from here .

Free Writing · Jeromes Journey

Eyes 

The secret to falling in love with someone and staying in love with them is the eyes . Fall in love with the eyes before you do anything else because no matter what happens the eyes will never change . They will always be there , good and the bad times , those eyes will never change . Ups and downs , they will always remain the same . No matter how much someone might grow , or evolve a little , you will never lose the first thing that you fell in love with , the ” hook ” that caught and lured you in . Fall in love with someone’s eyes and you will never be able to look them in the eyes again without feeling that love , no matter how rough a time might get , you’ll see those eyes and everything will suddenly be okay and you’ll be reminding that you are in deep love with them . If you’re trying to get in to somebody’s soul , go through the eyes to get there .

Once you fall in love with the eyes ..

It’s a wrap.

Free Writing · Jeromes Journey · Misc. Thoughts

Lost 

I feel empty . Lost and empty .

It’s like I don’t know what to do with myself . Like I’m constantly waiting for something but what .. I don’t even know what .. Everything I do , I’m rushing to get home .. It’s like no matter what I do I’m in a rush to go back to being alone so I can cry some more . The last thing I want is to be alone , but right now the king has stepped out .. It’s not a choice anymore , the loneliness I feel inside is temporary, I know it is .. But I just want my baby back .. I want this constant feeling of holding tears back to go away . My mouth feels shakey , my eyes watery .. My heart .. Empty .. I miss him so much .

Can this be over yet ..

Free Writing · Jeromes Journey

My superman 

Thank god for all that he has helped us get through and I will forever be grateful for his strength .

My fiancé means the world to me . I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have him , and I don’t know where I’d be . I like to believe everything has a reason behind it , all the good things and all the bad . This dark place we’re strongly fighting to get  out of all happened for a reason . I knew that I loved him , but I never knew how much until now .

Watching and waiting for six days helped me intertwine patience and strength into my life . It was a hard battle for us on the outside I could only imagine the amount of work his body has been through to keep him alive . He’s a strong man , I have a man built truley of steel and nothing less .

I lost him twice and I won’t ever lose him again for as long as I am breathing .

My baby he means the world to me & so much more . ❤️